Come on a run with me….

This morning whilst writing my morning pages, I noticed the urge within my body to get out of the house and go for a run… I had a choice to finish my pages or get up and go. I have committed to 'myself' to engage in the morning pages practice again so I completed my three pages and headed out the door…. 

Making step by step choices
Almost immediately it became apparent that though my body was keen to get out for a run my energy levels were not at their peak for a long hill run. Again, I had a choice in the moment - to push on through and probably feel slightly vitriolic or listen to my energy speaking to me and engage in a slightly shorter run, knowing that I would not feel completely replete and would be able to focus on the other things I wanted to get done during the day. 

Is it time to push on through or stand still?
As I started running up the first hill, it struck me that just a couple of days previously I had made it up the incline with very little effort and had felt like a gazelle (well, almost) and yet today it was taking every piece of willpower to place one foot in front of the other. The ground felt more uneven, the brambles more unwilling to let me pass and my body definitely feeling heavier. So in these moments, do we push on through, do we stop. I don't necessarily think there is a right or wrong answer to this - whatever we do it will gift us something in terms of experience and learning. What I do think is important in these moments is that we listen to ourselves a little more intently and a little more keenly. It may just be that there is a voice calling to us to that we are not hearing because we are over riding it with our stubbornness and willpower and strength. I might just add that I have these traits in abundance and am not saying that they are not great traits of my personality - they serve me well. (Mostly)

I did push on up the hill without stopping and my mind felt great for it. The softer side of my being that wanted to stop and lie down in a nurturing and held fashion by the Universe was sitting on my shoulder giving me that, 'hmmm…..were you really listening to yourself look?'. I have promised her that I will do just this later on today and give her the space and stillness that she deserves. 

Are you listening and hearing?
The other piece that struck me whilst I was running, aside from the fact I seem to get a lot of insights whilst running… heck I hope that doesn't mean I have to do more of it… is that whilst we are listening intently we may not always be aware of all that is going on within our bodies. And when I refer to bodies here, I am talking about the physical body, but I am also talking about the mental, emotional and spiritual bodies too. Given that I was unable to run up the hill in a gazelle like fashion this morning, it got me to thinking that there was probably a deep processing that took place in my body or bodies yesterday that I was unaware of. It feels important to share at this juncture that there are a lot of energies at play out there in the Universe, perhaps more than ever before, as others are currently sharing. We are upgrading and transmuting energies and growing at a faster rate than ever before (perhaps). Our bodies are working hard for us a lot of the time with simple tasks such as digesting our food etc but they are also working tirelessly with us on our energetic journey through life.

Perhaps now is a time to honour our bodies and what they are doing for us more than ever before even if we can't put words to everything that is occurring, we can get closer to how we are feeling if we not only listen, but hear what is being shared with us.

What is your approach to others and where is your energy body?
Anyway, I was not home yet so there was more running to do and insights to glean. On the other side of the hill and on my way back down I run through a field of cows. I'm always caught between wondering who would win in a race across the field, though I am happy to report that I have not been chased by them to date. On my last venture I was clearly more scary than them and spooked a number of them into jumping the brook to the safety of the other side of the field. This morning I chose a different approach. Before entering the field I made sure that my energy body was firmly inside of myself and let the cows know energetically that I was simply going to bypass them without disturbing or upsetting them and imagined that I could run past like a gentle whisper. Well, it seemed to work… the cows remained unaffected by my presence and whilst a couple looked up, they seemed curious rather than frightened. 

Begs the question how we approach all others in our life - where are we placing our energy and our intentions… interesting and fun to play around with. We all have very different boundaries within each of our energy bodies and knowing where they are can be key in how we relate to others. It can also be fundamental in understanding why we may affect others and how they may affect us, especially unconsciously.

How hard are your bodies working to keep you in balance?
As I made my way down the hill, nearing the home straight, I could feel myself speeding up - partly out of gravity being on my side and partly out of wanting to run faster as my uphill had felt a little slow and cumbersome (though clearly full of insights) and yet the ground still had other ideas for me. It was particularly rocky and uneven on my descent and after a couple of stumbles and wobbly ankle moments, I reluctantly slowed down, for which my energy was grateful and so was my body. Sometimes in life we simply have to slow down to speed up. If we run too fast and headlong into something we may not see all that is under our feet and may miss some of the vital learning's along the way. In slowing down - I realised just how hard my core was working to keep me in balance. Great to know that my body was working with me - if I had overridden it, it may not have been able to continue supporting me and it may have resulted in a grazed knee or twisted ankle. How hard are the different parts of you working to keep you in balance? Give them a chance to look after you. Allow integration to take place. 

You'll be pleased to know that I did allow myself to speed up along the road so that I could get back and write to you…. 

Now I give myself permission to go and have a shower.

Whatever your form of running might be - allow the insights to flow today - you might just surprise yourself.

With love and blessings, 
Nikola x

GET OUT OF YOUR MIND AND INTO YOUR LIFE..... REALLY??????

It has been a while since I have felt that impulse to write and to share a blog post.... the past year has largely been about retreating, being in nature, grounding and learning (not always successfully) to embody and feel how it is to 'be' present to both that which is around me and to myself.

I was implored to write this evening as I have just spent another four days immersed in Animal Communication Studies and delving, very consciously and lightly, into Shamanic practice. It has been yet another beautifully orchestrated few days, largely by powers outside of ourselves.....

One piece that has struck me deeply these past few days has been working with the element of Air - associated with our mind - the mental body. And what has struck me is that we are more often than not encouraged to get out of our heads and into our bodies. To get out of our head and into our hearts. To approach the world from a heart centred place. To listen to the seat of our intuition - arising from the gut or solar plexus. And I would not disagree. 

However, what I realised beyond doubt was that in an effort to do just that I have been negating my mind completely. It became clear that I have become so frustrated with my mind even being involved in my life, that at times it has felt like a dark and heavy cloud that I am carrying around with me, wishing that I could shut it off completely. In a concerted effort to get into my heart - I have considered a frontal lobotomy..... (not literally) but at times it has felt that desperate.

This weekend.... I had something of a revelation... a beautiful insight into the beauty of the mind. In thinking about it being linked to the element of Air, I realised that our minds are in fact incredibly fluid and if allowed the mind can actually create the flow between things - to be the orchestrator of the 'flow' in our lives. 

Our Elders taught us the sacredness of Air and the Beauty of our Minds

As the evening beckons, we are called to sit and share our stories, with the Elders and Medicine men and women of our Tribe. Called to share our mysteries with those able to hear and willing to listen. As we recall our tales of the element of Air, there is a palpable sacredness to the words that we use; a magic to the energy that emits from our beings.  For as we gather in ceremonial storytelling, we are aware that we speak not only for ourselves but give voice to the elements of water, earth, air and fire.

My story this evening is how the sacred element of Air gave rise to my mind feeling fluid and free. 

Earlier on that morning I had sat in serenity and sovereignty on the prairie listening to the breeze and awakening my senses and my imagination. As I chanced to look up an Eagle was soaring high above me. The majesty of its wings and presence felt through the reverberations of the air that passed between it and me. My mind able to grasp the deliciousness of the experience by allowing it to permeate my very being. 

I marvelled with my mind that Air is the flow between all things, it fills each space, just as my mind has an ability to flow, if I allow it, between the space of all thoughts, sensations and experiences.

I walked into a nearby glade, and closed my eyes, as I listened to the air making music between the branches and the leaves on the trees. My mind able to create sweet music or a more harmful discordant noise. Like the Air, the choice to move in any direction, to settle or to move freely along. No judgement, just an awareness of everything that it touches. A beautiful play of interconnectedness, just as the air moved through the long grasses on the prairie earlier that day. 

In my imagination I had encountered fallen trees knowing, like my mind, that it has the capacity to lift you up and to soar with the eagle, or to destroy and lay bereft and bare, awaiting the natural cycle of all to take place. With its coolness and warmth the air has its own beautiful balance and free flow - and so too, our minds.

The Elders smiled in acquiescence when I spoke of the power of the mind to create and to destroy, to free flow or to falter, but that there is always a beautiful balance to be found - you just have to want to feel it and to know it. Our minds, like air, perhaps the least tangible force of nature but a force to be reckoned with and held sacred within the entirety of our human being-ness.  

GET OUT OF  YOUR MIND AND INTO YOUR LIFE

PLEASE stop asking me to negate my mind completely. Yes, at times, there is a stillness or a quietening that may be required. Just as there is a beautiful balance when my mind becomes fired up with ideas and creativity and can deliver in words or orchestrate actions for my passion. 

My mind is as exquisite and a delicious a part of me as my heart and soul and limbs and all my other organs.... it is a part of the whole of ME. 

Let your mind free to be what it wants to be.... let it be fluid, let it soar with eagle, let it free fall, let it be the space between all things.... honour it, respect it, love it and it will do the very same for you in return.

With love and blessings,

Nikola