The Diamond Within...

"Diamonds are Forever... Forever.... Forever....."

You might be forgiven for thinking that I'm waivering from my spiritual journey and desire for non-attachment to the material world and instead opting for a life of glamour and glitz whilst manifesting for one of the most precious stones on the planet.... Not quite.

A very dear friend of mine used the metaphor recently of our being similar (does that make it a simile, rather than a metaphor... I digress) to a diamond. Being an Aries, with my birthstone being that of a diamond (sorry guys) and with a love of metaphors for life, this was one that I wanted to explore further and to share with you.

Diamonds are formed deep within the Earth:between 100 and 200km beneath the Earth's surface. They come into form under the most remarkable of conditions.They form at temperatures of around 900-1300 degrees celcius and are carried to the surface by volcanic eruptions. To ensure they are not converted to graphite, diamonds must be transported extremely rapidly to the Earth's surface. All natural diamonds are at least 990,000,000 years old. Many are 3,200,000,000 years old (3.2 billion years). A true diamond is known to be the hardest, strongest and most durable of all gemstones. In its natural state it is perfect in every way. A true representation of nature at its finest and most equisite.

So how does this relate to us as planetary beings?! We are at our very centre and in our natural state conected to the Earth in much the same way as the diamond. Our roots go far and beyond our comprehension and our inner essence is connected to the very core of this planet. We are born out of the very miracle of nature. A new-born child is akin to a diamond that has been pushed to the surface. Perfect and equisite. 

Diamonds, have been revered for hundreds of years by jewellers because of their equisite nature. Some are able to retain the essence of the diamond and keep it in as natural a state as possible and others play around with it so much that some of its natural beauty is lost. Whilst diamonds remain strong ... we are not always aware of their amazing brilliance or indeed where they came from.

When we enter this world our essence, our core, is incredibly strong, resilient, brilliant and full of light...  over the first seven years of our life we adapt to family, society, peer groups and we can start to lose a sense of our own strength and brightness.

So, what can we learn from an untouched diamond.... simply, that we have the ability to realign ourselves and our essence to re-connect with the core of who we are. Light, Bright, Clear, Strong and Resilient and Equisitely Beautiful in our natural state. We are always a Diamond within, we have just lost sight of it.

On a spiritual level, like many crystals and gemstones, diamonds are used for their healing properties. The Diamond is a symbol of the richness of the Self. As the hardest mineral of all, it is especially esteemed owing to its beauty, purity, and ability to reflect light in such a special way. It is believed that Diamonds bring purity, clarity and love to all situations.

When we are in alignment, such as a natural diamond, we are rich, strong and full of beauty. We resonate pure love and give off a brilliant light that has the capacity to strengthen and heal those around us. We have the ability to bring purity, clarity and love to all situations...

If you can, spend some time in stillness, reconnecting to your diamond within... notice where the clarity of your diamond may not be as clear as it needs to be. Notice where the light reflecting properties of your diamond are somewhat subdued. Notice if the heart of your diamond is full of colour and vitality....

Diamonds really are a girls best friend......

With love, light and clarity,

Nikola xxx

Attachments - Letting Go... Being in the Moment

"Grasping at things can only yield one of two results:
Either the thing you are grasping at disappears, or you yourself disappear.
It is only a matter of which occurs first."
Goenka

I have noticed myself reading much recently about the idea of 'letting go'. I have been conscious of hearing various people talk about the concept of letting go and that this does not mean giving up. It, therefore, seemed, timely to write a blog on this idea.

It seems that those things to which we are 'attached' can ultimately lead us to feeling out of control, feeling down or stressed, even cause us to behave in ways that is out of character, or hilights that part of our character that we do not like. And yet, letting go can be one of the hardest lessons that we learn in life. For in many ways it is through having attachments that we come to define ourselves. Attachment can be defined by an exaggerated not wanting to let go of something or someone.

It is through this exaggerated not wanting to let go of something or someone that we start to feel out of control.... this is ultimately because nothing actual belongs to us and certainly no other person belongs to us. At some point, all situations and people in our lives will change, whether that be today, tomorrow or in a few months or years.

In life, there's many things that we have to learn to let go of. We have to let go of situations, things, memories, people and even ourselves.  Whilst attachments do include the materialistic things in life these are not the attachments that I would like to focus on. For, in my experience, it is the attachments to other people or situations that bring about the greatest imbalance in our lives.

When we form an attachment to another person or to a particular situation, we are ulitmately giving away our power. You have heard me say before that noone can make us feel anything... how we feel in any given momen is our choice. It is our choice as to how we react to a person or a situation. Noone can make us feel sad, happy, ecstatic, angry, elated. When we form an attachment, in particular to another person, our behaviour becomes determined by whether that person is behaving in the way that we want them to. When we are attached to a particular person and situation, it can be extremely painful when we realise that the situation has to change and we have to let that person go. It may be possible that, that person was never "ours" in the first place. We've simply created an attachment in our minds. This can only and will inevitably lead to disappointment to one degree or another.

In order not to become attached, we have to learn to be in the moment. To live only in the present moment. For it is only in the present moment that we can notice what is real and true in any moment. 

If a butterfly were to alight on our hand... the pleasure would be in experiencing that moment. In allowing the butterfly to remain there for as long is wishes. The moment we go to hold onto that butterfly by trying to take it within our grasp, we either cause the butterfly to take flight or we crush it within our grasp... by not allowing the moments to unfold moment by moment, we have destroyed beauty in our desire to "own" the butterfly.

Take a moment to reflect on the people or the situations in your life where you are holding on so tight that the mere fact of it not showing up in your life the way you want it to, shows that you are not experiencing that person or situation in the present. Take time to see where you are projecting your thoughts... projecting thoughts of desire or wanting something to be different. All the time that you are attached to the outcome of this situation, you are not present and not experiencing joy in the moment. It may be that you are unable to see the opportunities that are in front of you simply because you are so attached to something or someone else.

Take some time over the next few days to notice where you are attached to your thoughts, feelings or actions about a situation or person. We realise that we are "attached" when negative feelings arise. Be that frustration, anger, sadness, confusion to name a few. Notice when you have these emotions. Take a deep breath and in that moment ask yourself how it would feel to let go of the emotion and to let go of the attachment to whatever it may be. If you are truly in the moment, then you will notice that you have a choice to allow the negative feelings to continue or do you choose to let go and let the Universe decide. 

"Do what you can, with what you've been given, in the place where you are, with the time that you
have." This quote was written by a South African boy who died of Aids at the Age of 12.

Whilst we continue to attach ourselves to people and to situations, life is passing us by....

Whilst we continue to attach ourselves to people and to situations, we spend time experiencing negative emotions.

Try letting go and see how empowered you feel... practice it in each moment... let go of the past and let go of the future... see how it feels to experience each moment... for that is all we have.

Love and blessings, always

Nikola x

Let go of the story - a lesson learned.

In my last blog I wrote the following:

"I have tried to find balance for others as well as myself, at times to the detriment of my own health and peace. 

I have been a warrior in life, fighting hard for what I believe in and I have retreated into a shell not allowing the world to touch me in any way. Much of my life has been filled with drama and confusion and pain but this is illusory..... it is just a story. I am not that story"

Interestingly in the last couple of weeks, I have allowed myself to subconsciously get caught up in my own story again. The story that it is better to be shy and reserved than confident and powerful. The story that it is better to serve than to lead.  The story that happiness can be found in giving all to others and not taking care to look out for the person who matters the most. Namely "Me" or if you are reading this, "You."

You see, what happens when you set store by doing everything for everyone else whilst playing out certain stories in your life, such as those above... people, arguably quite rightly, question your authenticity. 

If I am not the shy, reserved person of my story and I come across as powerful but dont stand true in that power, people get mixed messages about who I really am?! The trouble with human nature is that we are then very quick to judge and make assumptions.

My question to you then is, what stories are you playing out in your life because you feel it makes people more comfortable around you?

What stories are you playing out in your life because it feels safe, even though at the same time it might feel uncomfortable?

What parts of you are trying to be authentic but you're still dancing to other people's tunes and not your own?!

If, like me, you put other people's thoughts and feelings before your own. STOP AND THINK. Who is that serving? Is it serving you if people are getting the wrong impression? Is it serving them if they don't believe your actions are genuine?

The greatest gift you can give to yourself and to them is to put yourself first. Trust your instincts and do what you need to do for you. Stand in your Power and your Truth. Be the amazing, authentic human being that you know you can be. In doing so, you show up in your truth and power and they see you for who you truly are and not the story that you think will make them feel comfortable.

That way, everyone wins and noone loses......

Love and blessings, 

Nikola xx

Finding Grace.... My Story

Finding Grace has had a profound impact on how I now choose to tell and to share my story. Finding Grace, in its very essence, has held a mirror up and asked me to look within and to find the Grace within myself. 

My life is about balance. This has manifested in many different ways throughout my life and I have tipped the scales of emotion in my life to the very extremes of sheer desperation and to the highs of ecstasy. I have tried to find balance for others as well as myself, at times to the detriment of my own health and peace. 

I have been a warrior in life, fighting hard for what I believe in and I have retreated into a shell not allowing the world to touch me in any way. Much of my life has been filled with drama and confusion and pain but this is illusory..... it is just a story. I am not that story.

Finding Grace, for me, is about recognising the truth of who we are in a world that is perfectly balanced. And if what we are is a reflection of this world, then we have it within our power to be truly balanced.

We are all connected in a world of duality. Light and Dark. Ying and Yang. Fire and Water. Earth and Sky. Finding Grace, finding balance is about allowing my life to flow, to truly connect to the energies of this amazing planet we live on. If I can do this for just one minute of every day, then my heart will continue to open and to be nourished and natural balance will find me. I will no longer find myself being buffeted around by the life that I have created but will find myself making choices from a place of heart-centred openness.

Finding Grace is about relinquishing control and flowing. 

I may not know what the butterfly will look like or even when she will emerge but what I do know is that when she does she will be beautiful and full of Grace.

My heartfelt thanks to Lynda and The Finding Grace Project.

Love and Blessings,

Nikola xxx

Finding Grace....

Finding Grace is a beautiful project - the inspiration of a Very Beautiful Soul who also happens to be a good friend of mine.

Lynda Kelly has a dream.

Lynda is a very talented photographer, who is taking her passion for photography, and with it, choosing to change the lives of others. This year Lynda hopes to take 1,000 portrait photographs of women, who are prepared to share their story and the money raised will go straight to The Rainbow Trust. A charity who provide emotional and practical support to families whose children have life threatening or terminal illnesses.

Lynda is also an extremely intuitive coach and in the telling of your story through the medium of photographs, you will discover even more about your self and your story and you will have a beautiful portrait photograph of yourself to treasure.

Take a look at the attached link and if you would like to be a part of this amazing project then please contact me.... www.findinggraceportraits.co.uk

I am in the process of writing my own story of Finding Grace in my life as I had my photographs taken just a couple of days ago... I will share both the photographs and my story in my next blog post.

The project is magical so why not get involved, making one very special lady's dream come true and helping to support and enrich the lives of the children and families of The Rainbow Trust.

With love and blessings,

Nikola x

Serotonin - your natural happiness drug!

Time and time again you will hear me say that I believe that our bodies, hearts and minds have an innate ability to work healthily and effectively for us. Unfortunately, we constantly put pressure on all aspects of ourselves, or allow external pressures to affect us and our natural rythmn's and balance become out of synch. The consequences; feelings of stress, anxiety, depression - to name but a few afflictions.

Serotnonin is our bodies own natural chemical process that affects how we feel. Serotonin is a neurotransmitter, involved in the transmission of nerve impulses. It is this process that triggers feelings of happiness and is, therefore, believed to help regulate our moods, aiding sleep, calming anxiety and relieving depression. Your body makes serotonin out of the amino acid tryptophan and low levels are recognised widely as being associated with depression, anxiety, apathy, fear, feelings of worthlessness, insomnia and fatigue. Most prescription medication targets serotonin. 

We, therefore, need to recognise and understand for ourselves what it is that we need to do to change the levels of serotonin in our bodies to promote a natural and healthy response to depleting levels. 

Our diet, thoughts, emotions, behaviour and our connection to nature all affect our bodies natural chemistry. Relaxation, exercise, breathing and good nutrition all have a positive impact on our bodies' chemical processes. It is also no coincidence that time spent in nature has an effect on our serotonin levels. Energy from the sun and the earth helps  regulate our own natural balance. It is not just a mental process that makes us think we feel better, our chemical balance actually changes when we are in a more natural space.

It is possible to use all of the above techniques to manage your body's serotonin levels. Start to pay attention to the little things that make you feel good and systematically start to include them in your daily routine, to encourage your body to manage and to balance your serotonin levels. If you find yourself saying that you do not have the time or even the inclination - then ask yourself the question, which is more important. Your health and happiness or continuing to feel anxious, stressed or even depressed?!

What can you do that will help you to raise your body's serotonin levels?! Take time to express gratitude in the morning for all that you have. This immediately puts you into a constructive and positive frame of mind in the morning. Take a warm shower in the morning and visualise washing away any thoughts that don't serve you, any feelings of stress or anxiety. This in itself is enough to raise your serotonin at the beginning of the day. Take time to listen to your favourite music. Music that engages, relaxes and makes you feel happy. Eat nutritious food. We all know the feelings of guilt or indeed the actual physical reactions that our bodies have to food that does not make us feel good. So, don't go there in the first place. (Don't give yourself a hard time if you do) but simply make the choice to eat food that makes you smile and you choose to take the time to savour and to enjoy. Choose to spend time with loved ones and make it quality time. Take regular exercise and make sure that you recognise how the exercise makes you feel better and healthier. It is not about making yourself look better on a superficial level... it is about making yourself feel better from the inside out.

Start by making small changes on a daily basis and the effects will be felt on a much bigger scale... this I promise you.....

Let me know, as always, how you get on and share your experiences with me.

With love and blessings,

Nikola xx

Personal Coaching by Email

I am very excited that today sees the launch of my new:

"Personal Coaching by Email"

Whilst I feel very strongly that it is always important to continue to do the things you love and to always give time to yourself and to your needs and desires, it is not always as easy to put this into practice; especially when all the messages in the Media are telling us how expensive life is.... When we hear messages like that, many of us choose to forgo what are seen as lifestyle "nice to have's"  such as massage, coaching, yoga, meditation classes etc. Therefore, I wanted to offer you the opportunity to continue to give to yourself and your own development in a much more affordable way. Not only that, but I also wanted to incorporate my own strengths and passion into the work that I do.

Therefore, I have chosen to create an email Coaching facility to my business. As many of you will have heard me say before, my passion is words and I recognise my ability to coach through the medium of words. I am able to intuit far more from what people write than what they say. 

Coaching by Email - How will it work?

You will be able to email me at any time of day or night with your questions or coaching issues and I promise to get back to you within 12 hours... The difference being that you no longer have to wait until your next appointment to ask that all important question. You will be able to start implementing the changes that we write about as soon as you have read my response.

There are a number of incredibly inspirational sites on the internet now offering advice and support and blog sites that cover any number of subjects. What I am offering, is the chance for you to get a response and to make that advice and support personal to you.

I love reading columns in magazines that provide insight and inspiration, however, sometimes I feel the need for it to be more personal for me to truly implement it in my own life.

Coaching by Email - How much will it cost?

1 month = £10

3 months = £27

6 months = £54

There is no limit to the emails and questions that you can raise in that time. All I would ask is that your intent in using this service and posing your coaching issues is that they are real and of significance and importance to you.

Please do not hesitate to contact me at beinyourpower@live.com if you have any questions on how this might work for you.

I look forward to working with you over the coming weeks.....
Love and blessings, always
Nikola x