You are already everything.....

"Would that I could be all that I sense I am.....
Would that I could be all that I feel I am....
Would that I could be all that I know I am.... "

"But don't you see, my dear, you already are... and so much more besides"

Could it be that what I once knew without question or feign was the truth?! Could it be that the complexity is made up of all that is so simple to understand? Is it possible that I am coming to know now what I have always known, without fear, judgment or recourse.... Can it be that the answer was here all the time, not just within me but around me and through me and every piece a part of me and beyond?

Time is illusory.... I know not when I was first born into love, born of love... a part of love but I feel its seed inside of me, growing exponentially with every breath, with every heartbeat, with every desire to be more of love, a part of love, a part of me.

To look back on the course of one's life and to be able to smile incandescently at the up's, the down's, the high's, the low's.... no need for pithy anecdotal evidence. The drama's have all been superseded by the simple and most beautiful knowledge that all of life is the most precious gift. Within each wound is the gift of grace. Within each heartache, the gift of strength and power. Within each fall, the gift of a hand, an embrace, a heartbeat.

You see, I can't know any more now than I've always known.

The simplicity in this extraordinary knowledge is peace. No more. No less.

I see me.

I truly see me. Effervescent, light, angelic. Beautiful. No need to be special. I just am. A unique expression of a world so creatively balanced on a knife edge of all that is inextricably bound within our thoughts and our deeds.

You see me. I see you.

You see me. You see you.

The most true reflection. Being to being. Heart to heart.

As I place my hand on my heart so the world is a kaleidoscope of colours of every hue. Fragmenting and bouncing back to you the essence of your own heart.  Be still. Be true.

Profoundity from simplicity. You need know nothing else. You already know all there is to know. Be open and hear the music play upon the heart strings of your own song.

The Universe is a gift to you. Be grateful, be compassionate and see your world reflected there. It matters not your role or religion.... just another fractal of the whole. A kaleidoscope of all our dreams. Be mesmerised. Remember.

With love and blessings, always
Nikola xx

Are you ready to fully experience yourself....?!

So, as I dive deeper into a more intimate relationship with myself, I am ever more aware of the need and desire to be vulnerable, to be gentle and not to judge. As I dive deeper into an unparalleled understanding of the self, my self...I am increasingly aware of being met by some extraordinary energies. Both my own and the energies around me.

By diving into my vulnerability, I am getting to know my own innate power. The ying and yang, the push and pull, the complex and the simple. Authentic and true.... 

As I dive deeper into a more intimate relationship with myself, my mind, my body, my emotions, I am ever more conscious of my desire to serve humanity. I am increasingly aware that by seeking out my own vulnerability I have discovered my own power and the way that I currently wish to work with people. I say currently as I fundamentally believe that we are all like unfinished pieces of art or sculpture. We are creative works in progress, ever changing, ever evolving. 

Through diving into the depths of every nuance of my self, deep and lasting healing has taken place. How do I know this? There is a feeling of lightness of simply knowing. An inner smiling. 

The effectiveness is in the simplicity....

The results are in response to the desire....

Are you ready to fully experience your self? Your vulnerability and your power. Are you ready to open your heart and experience more sensations in your body? To be more aware. Are you ready to begin to heal? To feel lighter, to smile more. 

If you are interested in experiencing a session to fully experience yourself then why not send me a message.

In service and in love,

Nikola xxx

Dare to bare....

Never be afraid to be vulnerable....
In fact I positively urge you to be so.

It is in our ability to allow ourselves to be vulnerable that we can find our greatest power, our greatest wisdom and finally learn to trust in the complete package of who we are. 

The good, the bad, the ugly, the beautiful, the indifferent... they are all parts of you.
Your vulnerability will serve you if you allow yourself to sit with it.... no matter how uncomfortable that may feel.

Don't believe me, try it.
Watch the video.

Dare to bare...

"You are not everything you can be until you have dared to be vulnerable..." (c) Nikola King 2013

Permission to have a "God Complex" and "Be Inappropriate".... Courtesy of JC.

So, this blog post will be a treat of a diversion from my usual posts (or will it?!). 
Dedicated simply to the "bigging up" of one individual.... aka Mr Jamie Catto.

As hinted at by the title of this blog, this unapologetic wittering is intended to let other people know of his genius and encourage them wholeheartedly to sign up to one of his workshops... my support of all things Jamie Catto can be neatly categorised by the simple fact that for two whole days I was given permission to have a God complex and vociferously encouraged to be inappropriate.... well, why wouldn't you?!

Given that Jamie's self confessed abhorrence towards "appropriate" people was voiced early on, I did wonder whether I shouldn't just grab my coat at this very early juncture and bid a hasty retreat. Danger is, you retreat back to whence you came and dont get to see and to feel all the annoyingly valuable insights about yourself throughout the rest of the weekend.

I was just going to have to get over the fact that I am the most appropriate person I know and literally get 'over myself.' So, here is a question for you? Where does being appropriate get you? 

I can honestly say that being of a sensitive nature, I go out of my way to ensure that I don't offend, upset, behave inappropriately with anyone. Where do you think that gets me? Intriguingly people find themselves feeling offended or upset or feeling like I have behaved inappopriately because I'm not always voicing my truth in those moments. 

So, I got to be rude over the weekend - suffice to say it needs a little more practice (having spent years dampening down this side of my personality) but ironically when I am rude, it commands more respect because I'm being more authentic. 

Learning how to say, "Fuck Off" (sorry, mum) from a place of love is liberating.... 

And, what you will get from Jamie is no holes barred love and support (just so long as you don't make any apologies for who you are)... 

We are multi faceted, multi personality, multi dimensional creatures. All that we are is quite amazing just so long as you embrace the good, the bad and the ugly about you. 

So, what's it really like spending time with Jamie Catto and friends....?! Have no expectations and you will gain everything. If you are ready to step into a space of authenticity, truth and an awareness that we are more than just a little bit 'crazy' around the edges then I would urge you to go and spend some time with him. 

Jamie is clearly passionate about the work that he does - that's why I find myself in this space supporting his work and wanting to share.... I have no attachment other than hoping that at some stage in the future Jamie will begin to find me a little less "appropriate".

Jamie Catto.... YOU ROCK!!!

www.jamiecatto.com... the wonderful world of JC and it is a wonderful world to be a small part of, not least because of the other awesome beings you are destined to meet.

As always, shared with love 
(and with this edition a generous helping of God complex and inappropriateness)

Nikola xx

Turn around once in a while and smile at who you were.......

I've always loved words.... primarily the feeling of how words come together without thinking too hard about  what it is that I am trying to say or even how it may come across. Perhaps that's the crux of the matter for me. 'Words coming together without having to think too hard.....' As a self-confessed thinker and analyzer of that which does not need to be analyzed, finding something that can take me out of that head space is a true gift. I wonder, is this what it means to be in the flow.... allowing the sub conscious to perforate the conscious and dictatorial mind. 

I've tried other creative pursuits.... dancing, singing, art... all of which my head is still bound by its seemingly rightful place as dominant over my heart. Heavily practised in the art of criticism and profound ability to see that which is not perfect; and yet when I write my heart is ever present, ever knowing and ever seeing. When I write from the heart there are no boundaries and most importantly no judgments from myself.

So, why this particular blog?!

I came across a piece of writing yesterday that I would like to share with you that emphasizes the importance for me, of recognising where we have come from and where we are now. I have spoken before about not being drawn into the drama of a situation as it reinforces the emotions that may have been felt at the time. However, I do believe that there is deep and hidden value in once in a while, stopping, taking time to breathe, turning around and smiling at the steps that you have taken to take you from one place to the next. We do not celebrate ourselves enough. So quick to judge. So quick to be critical. So quick to not take time to stand and stare. Moreover, the importance of seeing and holding true the value of having been in that situation. 

I'm not sure when I wrote this piece. I am sharing because it reminded me in no uncertain terms just how far I have come. It is also a reminder to me that we are all vulnerable and fallible. These are strengths, not weaknesses. That we have the capacity to choose to learn from the choices we make is no happy coincidence. We are powerful beyond our own ability to comprehend. And it also makes me realise that even in my darker moments, I had a propensity for words. 

What is profoundly interesting for me in the following piece of writing is that I no longer see the girl that I am talking about, rather I feel deeply proud of the way the words are put together, their poetic hum and their ability to evoke emotion....

"To be honest, I am not very fond of my own company. I am not unaware that this fact has a tendency to make life somewhat difficult, given that wherever you go, there you are. Perhaps if I could remember when I first became aware of my distaste of my own existence, I could go back and re-write all beliefs and behaviours that have served to compound my inability to find myself either interesting or entertaining. I’d even settle for quirky. Surely everyone has the innate ability to be a little quirky sometimes, but alas... even that one seems to elude me. My therapist has the notion that my fascination with past life experiences have left my present worldly role somewhat lacking. I am sure that as a Gladiator under the shadows of the Great Coliseum of Ancient Rome and even being burnt at the stake as a witch left me, personally, in no doubt that my company was worthy of note. So, I am sure that you can begin to understand my dilemma.

To be honest, I don't recall ever being very fond of my own company. You would think that after two years, I’d be more than practised in the art of entertaining myself with thoughtful monologue or, that at the very least I would have come to relish the emergence of the extra voices that seem to echo around me. Yet, as I lie here in the vast and empty confines of my inner prison, I have yet to find a way of accepting the reality that the self, moreover my self, is not always enough. Now don’t get me wrong, the overly drawn out episodes of self-pity have long since passed. Ironically, in my state, I was in no position to end it all myself. So self-pity, albeit that it was a reflection I could still feel deeply and have irrational thoughts, did become more than a little pointless. I mean, what’s the point in self-pity if no-one else can hear you."

The mind loves proof. The above is proof of how far I have come but also proof that my gifts have been with me and remain with me regardless of the situations that I place myself in. Taking stock and noticing them from time to time is a great way to place a smile on your lips. 

What has always been with you, even in the darker moments? What do you find yourself doing when life gets a little tough to draw you out of your own reverie?

And if you don't, try writing, drawing, painting, dancing, singing, cooking, gardening, walking in nature.... what would the child in you do?!

And remember to...

Turn around once in a while and smile at who you were.....

For without them, you wouldn't be who you are.....

With love always

Nikola

Walk on water....

You said that you could walk on water


But your ego told you lies

You sunk beneath the waves of life

And gasped and flailed – you died


Within the depths you learned to breathe

And drowned out all the noise

Within your heart a stone, it turned

Life is different now


You said that you could walk on water

The soul it knows no lies

You’ve learned to ride the waves of life

You’re free, you’re one, Alive


Within the depths you learned to breathe

And drowned out all the noise

Within your heart a stone it turned

Life is peaceful now


The waves of life now hold you up

Not drag you down below

Dare you let yourself to dream 

To walk on water now

Doorways and Hallways....

"When one door closes another one opens....." 
~Alexander Graham Bell~

This quote goes on to say that often we spend so long looking at the closed door that we do not see the one that has opened in front of us.....
I have always loved this quote and yet it strikes me that if we do not see the open door, we are not necessarily aware that we have missed the opportunity except that we remain where we were, likely in an uncomfortable place or one that we wish would change.

On further reflection on this quote, it would seem pertinent to suggest that what is even worse is that we see an open door but we wait for someone else to take our hand and guide us through. Or we wait for someone else to drag us kicking and screaming through the door or to give us a gentle / hefty (delete as appropriate) kick up the derriere and launch us through the door.

Would any of these options give us the satisfaction that we are clearly looking for by seeking a new opportunity - looking for that open doorway?! I can be fairly certain that the initial joy of reaching the other side would be short lived and we'd soon be looking for another doorway to give us what we were looking for in the first place.

Forgive me if I am talking too much in metaphor.....

I had the opportunity to do a radio interview this week about my work and my message and one of the most important messages that I wish to share at the moment relates to the metaphorical splurge above.

We are living in very interesting times on an individual and global scale... and what is becoming more and more apparent to me is that there is an increasing number of teachers out there offering their support and guidance on how best to navigate our own personal trials and also how to navigate the global issues that are self evident. So, who do you follow? Whose advice and guidance do you seek? Who do you believe? Who do you trust? Who's telling the truth? Who is going to best help you in your particular personal dilemma, whatever that might be?

When you are in that dark hallway with the closed door behind you and the open doorway in front of you and you are alone, who do you ask about what should be your next move? There are no other ways out and there is no way that anyone else can find you in this hallway. What do you do?
Do you sit waiting and praying that someone will find you?
Do you re-enter the darkness to try and find the door through which you came?
Or do you start to trust the voice of intuition? Do you start to hear the voice of your heart and your head urging you to step towards the open door? What's the worst that can happen?
How would it feel to walk through that open doorway unaided into a new and exciting and vibrant opportunity?!

Let me make something extraordinarily clear.. I am in no way, shape or form suggesting that all those beautiful teachers and souls out there who are doing amazing work are superfluous to our requirements... quite the contrary. However, what I am saying is that as individuals we need to use discernment in our choice of which teachers we feel aligned to and whose message we resonate with. There is no right or wrong answer here.

I know I am not the only one in the field of personal development who spent many years going to as many workshops and different programmes as possible in order to "find myself"... trouble is that in an effort to find myself in amongst the multitude of different teachings I was hearing, I actually lost a sense of my truth, my awareness and most importantly my intuition. This was not down to the teachers or the courses but down to my desire to find myself. In hindsight, some of my time would have been better placed being still and with myself. Being with me and my intuition and my own inner guidance.  When we have a better understanding of ourselves and a deep awareness of who we are, then we can make a conscious decision to take on board what a teacher has said or disregard it as not important to us, as an individual.

So, in essence, what I am encouraging you to do.... is to become more deeply aware and aligned to who you are. Spend time with yourself, listening to your own inner voice and time listening to the needs of your body and mind for they are unique to you.

Then when a teacher, guide, coach, mentor, friend shows you an open door of opportunity... you have everything within you to make the choice to step through on your own, should you choose to do so.

The most important relationship we have is with ourselves....
Listen, learn and love.....

As always, shared with love

Nikola xx