On being super human......

"On being super human......"

The above statement is intended to be full of irony. I have been drawn to write a blog today for many different reasons so I will endeavor to keep it relevant and on point but you'll have to forgive me if I stray a little into different subject territories.

I read a blog post yesterday by someone who I think it is fair to say always has a very positive demeanour and works very closely with people on their development and whose time is spent supporting others to bring out the best in themselves and to see the positive in everything. His post was very heartfelt, open and honest as he spoke about the ending of his relationship. He admitted to feeling less than upbeat and was struggling to even post his video as the waves of emotion that were just under the surface, kept threatening to appear. He was having a down day. 

What struck me most was how powerful it is when people are honest and open regardless of whether they are struggling with their own emotions or not. His intent with his blog was to share that it is okay to feel less than positive and that it is also important to sit with the pain sometimes in order to learn the necessary lessons. This message is just as important as listening to someone who is full of beans and relaying a super-positive story.

There are two elements here that I really wish to pick up on. Firstly, it feels important for me to say that even those of us who place ourselves in a position of being a teacher, coach or similar and  strive to deliver a positive message as often as possible, also have down days.  Those of us who have chosen to light the way for other people on their journey's and to challenge and support others with their own development, also have days when we lose sight of what it is all about. We have days where all we want to do is cry. We get frustrated, angry, upset. We have to dip into our toolbag and dig deep to get us out of how we are feeling in that moment. 

I for one dislike the term guru which seems to get bandied around the self development field.. I personally don't feel that anyone is any more evolved or any more able to share their lessons and to teach their messages than any one else. It is simply a question of where each of us is on our journey and the paths we have chosen. What you have to share with someone else is unique and just as valid and valuable as the next person. Therefore, I feel it is critical and important for those of us in the field of development to show our vulnerable sides and to re-affirm that we are not super human. Or, another way of putting it is that if I am super human, so is every other human being on this planet. 

The second element that I want to pick up on is how important it is to sit with the pain sometimes. I am not talking about wallowing as that is another thing entirely. However, it is also important not to resist the feelings. For as the adage goes, "what we resist persists." Therefore, it is important to acknowledge the so-called negative feeling and ask ourselves what is it teaching us. What lessons have we learnt from this episode, this time in our lives? If we resist the "down" feeling and put on a brave face, the emotions are simply stored in a deeper part of our being and will re-emerge when another situation causes us to react in a similar way. If we choose to sit with the feeling and learn the lesson, we are in a position to be grateful for the lesson and let it pass. 

This brings me nicely onto the next point which is this... if you are struggling to get yourself out of the pain of the moment, that is okay. The simplest way to make yourself feel better in any situation is to practice gratitude. Be grateful that the situation has arisen for out of every struggle or every obstacle, we can learn and move forwards and be a more rounded human being. Also being grateful in the moment helps to release any negative tension that may have built up in the body. You'll know where you tend to feel tension and where you hold it. As soon as you remind yourself to be grateful for what you have, for who are you, for the little things in life.. you take yourself back to your heart and a place of love. Your body immediately forgets to hold onto the negative energy and you find yourself in a far better place to deal with whatever it is that life is throwing at you!!

So, allow yourself to be vulnerable and open as you don't know who you might be helping and supporting in doing so. We are all equal, simply on different journey's. Be careful not to put someone onto a pedestal as they will fall off it!!!

Practice sitting with the pain of a situation - being careful not to wallow or get into the drama of it. Do not resist. Allow yourself to feel it fully and it will pass with more grace and ease. 

And remember, if all else fails, be grateful.... we all have something to be grateful for....

Will love and gratitude to you for allowing me to share,

Nikola xx