When things start to feel out of our control, something I have felt, many many times over the years, it would seem to be easier to look for reasons outside of ourselves in order to find the answers we are seeking.
It is no different when we are talking about depression. How much easier would it be if we could find someone or something or a situation to blame for how we are feeling? Much has been documented over the years about how depression may well be gentic - passed on through generations, not just our immediate blood parents. I believe that in many cases there is truth in this. I certainly don't remember a time when I didn't feel the weight of despair dragging me down. I certainly believe that depression can be held in our very cells and even encoded in our DNA.
I have two choices. I can either choose to blame genetics and even go so far as to blame my parents for suffering from depression or for being depressed when I was conceived and in the womb and remain in a victim mentality or I can choose to take responsibility.
No matter how you perceive your depression to have first taken over your life, the most important step in moving on and away from victim mentality, is to take full responsibility. Noone else can make you feel the way you do. How you feel in any given situation is up to you. This in itself can be quite challenging for people. The reason that it is challenging is that our intuitive selves know this to be true. And if this is true, then we can no longer look outside of ourselves to place the blame. We have full control over our emotions and how we choose to feel.
When you have suffered from depression for any length of time, this is a really challenging concept to accept. I know. I still have moments when I get angry or frustrated. If I choose to stay in a state of anger then I am choosing to stay in a state of negative energy and depression.
Instead, I choose to see depression as a gift. If I had not suffered, I would not be here writing this now from the depths of my heart wanting to share with you and support you through your own journeys. I am here to bring light to myself and to encourage you to do the very same.
Therefore, I would ask you to take the time and share if you would care to do so, where you push responsibility onto the shoulders of others or situations that have caused you to feel depressed. Take some time to recognise when and how you do this. Give thanks for the lesson and let it go. Begin your journey by taking full responsibility for your own healing. If you can do this, then you have taken the biggest step of all......
With love and blessings.....
Nikola xx
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